Managing Difficult Behavior in Children
							"He never does anything I ask him to do unless I yell."  "Whenever she doesn't get what she wants, she throws a fit."  "If other kids don't do what he wants, he hits them; this happens a lot with his sister."   Talk to Someone Who Can Help...
							Difficult Behaviors Create Problems For Children Themselves As Well As For Those Around Them  Difficult behaviors often include... Temper tantrums Physical aggression Verbal aggression Defiance Irritability Impulsivity Restlessness Hyperactivity Self-control problems  Difficult behaviors may also be accompanied by signs of low self-esteem, discouragement, and sadness. While all children display difficult behaviors at times, some show these reactions quite frequently and with intensity, thereby causing significant problems for themselves and others.
		Causes of difficult behaviors can include... Temperament Some children are born with tendencies to be intense and negative in their moods. Such temperamental tendencies may set the stage for difficult behaviors later on. Stressful Life Events Poverty, marital problems, learning difficulties, and other stresses may lead children to act out. This is particularly true for children whosetemperaments make them more reactive. Childrearing Practices Children need positive attention and support from their parents. If there are not enough positive interactions with parents, children may act up in order to gain attention and control over others. Nervous System Functioning Some problems, such as attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), are often the result of difficulties in the way certain areas of the brain function. Impulsivity and problems with self control can often cause problems at home, in school or in other areas of a child's life. Everyday Life Circumstances Difficult behaviors may occur when children are tired, hungry, sick, or disappointed. Other common life events that may create difficult behaviors include school and examination stress, sibling rivalry, physical appearance, sports ability and peer pressure. A child who engages in frequent problem behaviors is not a happy person. Difficult behaviors may be a sign of depression or anxiety, especially in children.
						Other signs of depression may include... Low self-esteem Changes in eating or sleeping habits Frequent shifts in mood Social withdrawal Sadness or apparent lack of emotion Low energy levels Little pleasure in activities Suicidal ideas or attempts Alcohol and drug abuse
						How Parents Can Help... Improve the Parent-Child Relationship Focus on positive interactions with your child. Spend regular individual, pleasant time together. Listen respectfully to his/her interests, ideas and problems. Give frequent positive feedback for appropriate actions. Build a strong parent-child relationship. This is the foundation upon which effective discipline is built. Like adults, children respond best to those they feel the closest. Have Reasonable Expectations Match expectations of your child's behavior with his/her age. Rely on direct parental actions rather than reasoning when responding to preschoolers. Try reasoning and explanations when talking to older children and teenagers who have a more developed ability to think. Positive and negative action from parents in response to their children's behavior is important at all ages. Talk to Someone Who Can Help. Be Clear About Expectations Let your child know what is expected by giving brief, clear directions without negative emotions. Tell your child what you want him/her to do rather than only what you want him/her not to do. Provide Consistent Feedback Praise your child when he/she behaves well and show appreciation for his/her efforts. Offering praise and appreciation along with special treats or small prizes may help your child change inappropriate behaviors that are strong and long-lasting. Use punishments less often than positive feedback. Punishment can be reasonable and effective when given quickly and without strong negative parental emotion. Time out or short-term removal of a privilege are helpful forms of behavior management. Psychological help is needed when children's behavior problems are frequent, intense and cause significant difficulties for themselves and others.  A Psychologist Can Help emotionally support parents so that they enjoy their children more teach parents how to help their children to be more responsible improve a child's social skills so that they feel better about themselves and get along better with other children reduce school related problems consult with the school regarding your children's behavior manage difficult behaviors and keep problems from getting worse All children are unique. They all have special needs that differ with age, family, cultural values and life experiences.
		Prepared by: Drew Edwards, Ph.D., James Cosse, Ph.D., Sheila Eyberg, Ph.D., and Susan Sachsenmaier, Ph.D. The Brochure Project A Joint Venture of the Divisions of Psychotherapy and Independent Practice American Psychological Association Co-Directors: Alice Rubenstein, Ed.D. and Sandra Haber, Ph.D. Publication Coordinators: Abraham Wolf, Ph.D. and Peter Sheras, Ph.D. © The Brochure Project, 1998 (602) 854-8950
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